Goodbye October 2010!

In a few minutes, October 2010 will be a thing of the past, and we will welcome November 2010 with open arms. Will we?

I've been spending a lot of time trying to write ('trying to' being the operative word), and I hope I get into full swing with it by tomorrow. Lots of reflections happening as we round up the year. I don't really believe in annual resolutions. Instead, I prefer making month-to-month goals which are more realistic and easier to achieve.

In an effort to start the month off on a clean slate, I've replied all my overdue / unanswered emails and am ready for the challenges that the next month has for me.

My laptop was giving me some problems - the cursor kept jumping around while I was typing, so apparently the touch pad was too sensitive and I had to disable it. I took it in, and was told that I needed to download a driver for the function keys. It made no sense why I had to do that, so after fiddling around, I managed to sort out the problem all by myself (pat on the back, thank you very much!) Also, I'm running Windows 7 which I'm not used to so that also made it a bit tricky.

I attended a funeral in Berlin (Eastern Cape) on Friday with my parents. It went on for hours, but it was a good cultural experience, nonetheless. Later that evening, Friday October 29 2010 I was at Numbers for the Last Friday Party which I've just blogged about.

It's pretty hard to believe that Christmas decor have been up in the mall for a couple of weeks now. Anyways, I wish you all a fabulous and blessed month of November :-)

Last Friday Party

This was my first Last Friday Party, and I was excited as ever. The event was going to be Jozi DJs vs Durban DJs and the line up included: Fistaz Mixwell, Christos, DJ Tira and DJ Fisherman. Numbers was packed to capacity that they even had to close the door and refuse people in! I spent the whole night in the DJ box - which I think was a safe & wise thing to do! Fistaz didn't make it after all, but OH HOT DAMN! The other DJ's sure made up for it. My brother and I both agree that Tira isn't just a DJ - he's an entertainer and performer. Loved his set!

After the gig, I tweeted a bunch of things with the hash tag Things I Learned Last Night:

...you can get high JUST on music.
...how much I really love Kwaito music.
...that DJ Mo exists in different sizes and forms (and different names) > Intersexions
...sometimes I'm safer jamming alone in the DJ box.
...I have no tolerance for jezebel's after midnight.
...saying I'm the DJs sister will make guys take a back step - literally.
...you get DJs and then you get DEEJAYs.
...I STILL don't get what's behind wearing shades in a club.
...It's pointless trying to rationalize with a girl in a blonde weave at 04:30.

The Wheels of Life

Any words you speak have a frequency

Any words you speak have a frequency, and the moment you speak them they are released into the Universe. The law of attraction responds to all frequencies, and so it is also responding to the words that you speak. When you use very strong words, such as "terrible", "shocking" and "horrible" to describe any situation in your life, you are sending out an equally strong frequency, and the law of attraction must respond by bringing that frequency back to you.

The law is impersonal, and simply matches your frequency. Do you see how important it is for you to speak strongly about what you want, and not to use strong words about what you don't want?

Sylvia - Our Maid

Sylvia with her baby, Ziyanda

This post is just a ramble.

For the purpose of this blog, I think I need to define a few terms (from The New Penguin Dictionary)

Domestic worker

A person employed to do household tasks.

Helper/Help

1) Aid or assistance.

2) Somebody hired to do work, esp housework.

Servant

Somebody who or something that serves others specif. somebody employed to perform personal or domestic duties for somebody else.

Maid

A female servant.

Job: 

A regular paid position or occupation.

Some people dislike the term "maid" (Is it derogatory? If so, why?) so they opt to use "domestic worker" or "helper". Without wanting to offend anyone, I sometimes find myself using "domestic worker" and "helper" when talking about Sylvia, who works for us. This morning I got to thinking "What is wrong with the term 'maid'?" 

I actually asked Sylvia what she preferred: "Domestic worker", "Helper" or "Maid"?

"Maid or Helper is OK. I don't like that word Domestic Worker. I'm hearing it on the TV, I don't like it," she told me. (She didn't say why)

So I will use the term "maid".

Sylvia used to work at a plastic factory and about 9 years ago, she found herself unemployed. At that time, our previous maid, Victoria, passed away so my mother was looking to employ someone else. By word of mouth, Sylvia came to our house for a job and with no experience of running a household, she was employed.

Sylvia loves fashion and my mum and I have given her a lot of clothes, jewelry and make-up which she wears on a daily basis. Apparently, her friends ask her, "What does your ma'am say about you dressing like this?" to which she replies, "My ma'am makes me smart!"

This morning was like any other. I was having breakfast with my mum when we buzzed Sylvia in. We complimented her on her jewelry and colour combinations that she had on today. 

Then my mum told me about someone we know who was looking for a maid, so Sylvia's sister, Cynthia who was looking for a job went to this lady's house. "Not even a day or two she worked there, and said no, she (Cynthia) is too fashionable."

"She fired her?" I asked my mum.

My mum nodded.

This woman fired her maid, because she was "too fashionable".
Tell me, have you heard anything more ridiculous?

I think you should appreciate that someone takes the time and effort to look presentable when working for you. Don't you agree?

Chatting to Sylvia this morning, I asked her why she chose to work in a house when she never did before. 

"It's a job," she said.

"Do you like it?" I asked.

"Ooooh - I like it, the people are so good, so I am happy. When I come to your room, I want to clean it and make it beautiful with all my heart." she told me. (...and she really does!)

She told me that she's grateful for the things my parents have helped her with. Her daughter who was 20-something passed away a month or so ago and my parents helped out with the funeral. She also has a teenage daughter and a one year old who my mum also helps out with by buying her things or taking them to the doctor.

I asked Sylvia why she dresses up in the morning only to come to work and change into an apron...and then at 15:30 dress up again to head straight home.

"For the people in the street. I want them to see me. I have a job," she said.

I do consider Sylvia part of our family and the way she dresses to and from work is actually no business of ours, but I'm proud to say that she works for our family.

To be brutally honest, I feel ashamed to say that i know someone who fired her maid for being "too fashionable".

As Twitter friend, Kagiso said this morning: "Being a maid is just a job like any other". 

Jezebel (Professor ft Oskido & DJ Tira)

So this choon - Jezebel - has swept across Mzansi. And yes...I like it!

What is a Jezebel? Put simply, a girl who swoons over DJ's :) I don't know what the song means exactly - but be sure that I'm going to ask a few DJ's I meet next week (Fistaz Mixwell, Tira & Fisherman) when they're down in EL for The Last Friday Party.

Oh, the games adults play!

From Google Images

Some people will argue that games are for children, but recently I've been led to believe that games are very much for adults, too. I'm not saying that we're any good at it, but it appears as though we love playing with each other's minds and feelings.

In my honest opinion, the worst kind of game that can be played amongst adults is the kind between males and females. Let me create a scenario for you.

Boy likes girl. He waits a couple of months before he reveals his true feelings to her. They don’t live in the same city so their communication is via new age technology.

Girl realizes that she likes him too. So there's this flirting going on back and forth every few days or so. One day, boy doesn't reply one of girl's messages and what does she do? She starts assuming all kinds of things. "He probably has a girlfriend and was only fooling around with me" or "He's a player" or agrees with her friends who would say, "See, I told you - ALL men are idiots". Just when she's about to write him off, his name appears in her Inbox with a message laced with words of affection. The flirting picks up right where it left off and she's soon forgotten how upset she (almost!) got when he hadn't replied her before. 

What she doesn't know is that he was actually testing her! He wants to see if she only responds to conversations he initiates. 

He doesn't know that she was testing him as well. She wants to know if he was really that interested in her or if her friends were right - that all men are just after one thing.

Now, it's 11:53pm and she lies in bed - half awake, half drifting off to sleep. She feels like talking to him or at least sending him a message to say goodnight. She knows her sleep will be that much sweeter if she sees his name in her Inbox before she sleeps.

Does she send the message? No. Instead, she thinks: "What if he's sleeping?" or "What if he's busy?" and the worst: "What if he doesn't reply?"

This causes a whirlwind of thoughts to accumulate in her otherwise calm state of mind.

She falls asleep waiting for her cellphone to beep, buzz and do anything else it's meant to do to alert of a new message.
Nothing.

When she awakes in the morning, the first thing she does is check her phone.
Nothing.

Hours later, he calls her, but she doesn’t answer.  When the ringing stops, her phone beeps with a text which reads, “Hey babe, it seems as though there was no network last night, only got your text now. Sorry!Tried calling, will try again later. Hope you have a good day. Mwah.”

She doesn’t reply the text and she doesn’t call him back. She wants to give him the impression that she’s not that desperate to talk to him - despite the fact that her heart is pounding against her chest and she does feel relieved to hear from him.

All day, she thinks about him and wills her phone to ring. She will not call him. He must call her. He does. She answers as if she doesn’t have caller ID and tries to act surprised when she hears his voice. When he asks if she got his text and saw his missed call, she nonchalantly says that she saw it but was occupied at the time. 

The girl is playing hard to get.

Girls shouldn't play hard to get with a man who's hard to get.

When it comes to games, many of us are sore losers. And when, as adults, we play these mind games, there is seldom a winner and a loser. Either both win or both lose - with tears and heartache as a bonus.

Defeats the purpose, doesn’t it? So why do we torment ourselves – and others?

Oh, the games adults play!

13-year-old girl demands free iPhone repairs

From Korea Times

An iPhone user Tuesday filed with the Seoul Central District Court a lawsuit against Apple Inc., demanding that the U.S. handset maker pay repair costs for her damaged phone.

The 13-year-old girl lodged the suit against Apple's Korean unit, calling for 300,000 won (about $270) in compensation. It marks the country's first civil action against the global handset manufacturer's after-sales service policy.

She bought an iPhone 3G last February that broke months later,and brought her smartphone to an authorized repair shop earlier this month, a court official said.

However, the company reportedly rejected her free repair request, saying that she dropped the smartphone in water. 

Unpacking & Realizing: Less is More

When I decided not to renew my contract with my employer in South Korea, I knew that I had a mammoth task ahead of me. I had to pack up three years of my life which was crammed into a studio apartment. I started the process in June and sent quite a few boxes to South Africa so that it would reach here by the time I got here myself (August/September).

Well, some of the boxes have arrived. To be quite honest with you, I can probably list 10 items that I know are in there (and that I'm kind of missing). Otherwise, the other things...I can't remember what I've packed!

I know that there are a lot of my clothes (winter clothes are bulky), books, teaching materials and music CDs. But that's about it. For all I care, the other "knick knacks" could be tossed away and I wouldn't even miss it!

I planned to tackle the boxes this morning (Monday, October 18 2010) It's a beautiful sunny day in EL and I'm in the mood to LET GO of many things. So I opened the smallest box first and found manuals for my camera, a fancy umbrella and some teaching guides. I had no idea where to begin and what to unpack first. So what did I do? I came back inside to write this blog!

I've always maintained that before moving onto a new adventure, you need closure of your last one. By clearing out my boxes and kind of 'wrapping up' my life in Korea, only then can I look forward.

This also got me thinking - I have more than what I actually need. I won't say that it's all clutter, because at the time (in Korea) of course, I needed things like teaching guides, maps and such. I tried to have minimal things in my apartment, but when you're like me - who collects books and gadgets, they're bound to accumulate. I have manuals, cables and chargers for things I don't know I own. When I go shopping for ONE make-up item, I end up with a bag full of free goodies which I have no idea how to use. It's all unnecessary. I also got a lot of gifts from colleagues and my student's parents - some of which lie dormant and up as dead weight in my life.

So let me get back to it. I intend on giving a lot of things away. I don't need two or three of something when just one will suffice.  After all, less is more.

CWG 2010 Opening Ceremony in Delhi

The CWG 2010 held in Delhi is over. The opening & closing ceremonies were simply incredible. Here are just a few photos that were sent to me via e-mail. Thanks, Ajay!

Lady Gaga's Meat Dress

Yeah yeah, I know - this is stale news, but I didn't blog about it before. So, I'm just uploading these photos of wacky Lady Gaga who wore a "meat dress" at the MTV Video Music Awards on Sunday, September 12 2010. Got these pics via e-mail from my dad!

What Will Matter

Thanks to Ajay for this!

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WHAT WILL MATTER

by Michael Josephson

Ready or not, some day it will all come to an end.

There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.

All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.

Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.

It will not matter what you owned or what you were owed.

Your grudges, resentments, frustrations and jealousies will finally disappear.

So too, your hopes, ambitions, plans and to-do lists will expire.

The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.

It won’t matter where you came from or what side of the tracks you lived on at the end.

It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.

Even your gender and skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought but what you built,

not what you got but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice that enriched,

empowered or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew,

but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.

What will matter is not your memories but the memories of those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered, by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident.

It’s not a matter of circumstance but of choice.

Choose to live a life that matters.

The Power of Gratitude

We can never bring anything to us unless we are grateful for what we have. In fact, if somebody was completely and utterly grateful for everything, they would never have to ask for anything, because it would be given to them before they even asked.

That is the power of Gratitude.

Strangest & Most Beautiful Streets in the World

Got this via e-mail from my buddy, Ajay.

Thankful Thursday

The reason I've been so slack about my Thankful Thursdays is because...Well, to be honest, I have no excuse. If I did say something, I'd probably be lying. Today my mum reminded me about this and I thought that I had to get back into it. Today. A lot has happened since my last Thankful Thursday post, but here's my list as it is in my life right now.

I'm thankful for:

• ...being with my parents and brother.
• ...friends I've met - even in "faraway" places.
• ...my parent's health.
• ...my health.
• ...the food I eat.

What are you thankful for today/this week?

A thankful heart is not only the greatest virtue, but the parent of all other virtues. -Cicero

InterSEXions - Do you know your lover's lovers?

                                Google Images

Last night, Tuesday October 13 2010 was the premiere of a new educational drama series on SABC 1. Titled Intersexions, viewers will understand how our lives are all somehow connected and that our paths cross in one way or another. This becomes even more complicated when when we become sexually active and our "network" extends to people we don't even know of.

The punchline of the series is "Do you know your lover's lovers?"

The opening scene of the first episode introduces us to a career-driven woman who, in her wedding dress, is on her phone closing a business deal. Moments before she is about to walk down the aisle, she receives a message on her answering machine. It's her ex-boyfriend who tells her that he is HIV positive. 

What should she do? Call the wedding off? Walk down the aisle anyway?

She does the latter. On their wedding night, she's cold and tells her husband that she's just tired. A few days later, he confronts her about not being intimate since their wedding night. She lies and tells him that she's pregnant.

As the saying goes, the truth will always come back to haunt you...and it does. Her husband soon finds that she and a well-known DJ (whose HIV status is known nation-wide) were lovers and he storms out the house in a rage. 

She tells the doctor that she isn't the kind of girl to sleep around and that she can count her sexual partners on one hand. She's told, "It's not about how many sexual partners you've had. Do you know who your lover's lovers were?"

Each episode will present different characters and situations, but the core theme will remain the same which is making viewers aware of the risks involved with contracting HIV.

Says Producer, Karima Effendi of Curious Pictures, "The onus is on each individual to take responsibility for their sexual choices. Intersexions does not judge; it simply tells stories that show how the risk of being infected with HIV is always waiting for an opportunity to take root. we can minimize infection by becoming more conscious of our sexual choices and our everyday decisions."

A central theme of the series is honesty...to ourselves, our family, friends and most importantly, to our lovers. Our lives are intersected at various times in our life, and if we don't take the necessary precautions we may very well be faced with a life and death situation sooner than we ever hoped for.

Feel the force: Tube-nosed bat

From Korea Times

A tube-nosed fruit bat with an appearance reminiscent of the Star Wars Jedi Master Yoda has been discovered in a remote rainforest. 

The bat, along with an orange spider and a yellow-spotted frog are among a host of new species found in a region of Papua New Guinea. 

More than 200 animals and plants were revealed for the first time after two months of surveying in the rugged and little-explored Nakanai and Muller mountain ranges last year

The findings included two mammals, 24 species of frog, nine plants, nearly 100 new insects including damselflies, crickets and ants, and around 100 spiders.

Facebook: Reasons to 'unfriend' someone

From cnn.com

10:10:10 10-10-10

Yes, I'm a day late. This was yesterday...

10 seconds after 10 minutes after the 10th hour on the 10th day of the 10th month in the 10th year of the century!

Eat Pray Love - The Movie

When I heard that Elizabeth Gilbert's memoir, Eat Pray Love (EPL) would be delivered to us on the silver screen, I must admit that I was a bit skeptical. I’m not easily swayed when books are turned into movies. 

 I read the book sometime last year and I wanted everyone I knew to read it as well. 

It's the kind of travelogue that makes you want to chat about it with a friend over coffee. You'll want to salivate over the pizza in Naples, you'll want to learn more about the tradition of arranged marriages in India and you'll want to discuss the colourful characters the protagonist meets in Bali. 

When I heard that Julia Roberts would star in the film, I couldn’t imagine anyone else essaying the role of Elizabeth Gilbert. Perhaps it could just be a hit. I've waited a long time to see this film (friends in the US saw it back in August already!) so on Friday, October 7 2010 my mum and I watched it together.

“I want to go some place where I can marvel at something.” 

This is what Elizabeth (Liz) Gilbert tells her friend after realizing that she has “no pulse”. A woman who should have been happy with what seemed like a full life (a career, husband and new home) she felt like she was in a rut and as a result, she lost her thirst for life.

Many of us can identify with this feeling. Why am I here? Who am I?

6 Principles of Life

I got this via email from my buddy, Ajay.

No point using limited life to chase unlimited money.

No point earning so much money you cannot live to spend it.

Money is not yours until you spend it.

When you are young, you use your health to chase your wealth;
When you are old, you use your wealth to buy back your health.
Difference is that, it is too late.

How happy a man is, is not how much he has, but how little he needs.

No point working so hard to provide for the people you have no time to spend with.

We come to this world with nothing, we leave this world with nothing!

'The Arch' celebrates his 79th birthday & his retirement

Today, Thursday, October 6 2010 marks two milestones. Archbishop Desmond Tutu celebrates his 79th birthday and it is the day that he bows out of public life.

Happy Birthday and God Bless!

'The Arch' turns 79 today                                            From Google Images

Wham: Wake me up before you go go

This song has been on replay in my mind for ever so long!

South Korea: Ban on 'gay drama' in prison creates stir

From Korea Times

   From Google Images

By Bae Ji-sook

Does watching a TV drama featuring a homosexual relationship cause men to become gay?

The Ministry of Justice and some parents apparently think so. 

The ministry ordered the authorities in charge of managing correctional facilities nationwide to stop showing “Life is Beautiful,” an SBS TV drama, to inmates from Aug. 4, expressing fear that the portrayed gay relationship in the show would affect them negatively. 

The ministry runs the “Borami” network, which records TV programs and reruns them for inmates. “Life is Beautiful” used to air every Wednesday.

“The program was promoted as a family drama. However, the focus seemed to have moved to a gay relationship, which does not suit the purpose of the Borami network,” a ministry official said. 

Ladies Pamper Tea (for Hospice)

On Saturday, October 2 2010, my mum and I were invited to a Ladies Pamper Tea in aid of Hospice since October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Each table had a different theme

One lady gave an emotional talk about her dad who passed away a month ago from cancer. She spoke about the care and sensitivity displayed by those working at Hospice. There was also a fashion show and displays of jewelry, cosmetics and Tupperware.

Damelin's House for Charity Emergency Party

On Friday, October 1 (2010) Damelin held their House for Charity Emergency Party at Numbers. This is an annual charity event with national DJs coming down for it. This year, the DJ lineup was: Euphonik, Lady Lea & DJ Damage - my brother!

The whole family was invited by the college and got VIP passes. My brother started off with a video set - rocked it solid! Lea then took over, followed by Euphonik and rounded off with Damage once again.We got home around 04:30 - it was a fun night...with numb feet and a sore body to prove it the next day :)

Numbers Dance Club - before the event started

Mum, me, brother (DJ Damage) and dad

With my big bro, Vijayan

With friend, Brian

With DJ Euphonik

Lady Lea taking over the decks from DJ Damage

View from DJ box - Euphonik on the decks